Cupcake! WOW!

I’ve been baking cupcakes for Monday’s Mom It Down. I’m learning stuff, perfecting stuff by simplifying it as much as I can. In doing so, I have had quite a few cupcakes around lately. This is what happens when Emory realizes there are cupcakes in the house.
And we’re not sure where this technique originated, my guess is at school. But it’s awesome. He pretend eats stuff and then uses his hands to show it moving down into his belly.

Last, but not least, today is not only Pony Day at school, but costume day as well. Look at mommy’s little Chelsea soccer player!

Happy Friday, my friends.


A few weeks ago, we had a parent-teacher conference at Em’s preschool. He was 19-months-old at the time and I assure you, the absurdity here does not escape me. But this is the sort of thing that happens when you combine over-achieving, uppity parents with bloated, private school tuitions. They come up with parent-teacher conferences where terms like “fine motor skills” and “sensory stimuli” are used in place of “he mashed Play-Doh” or “we found him digging through the trash.”

Naturally, I got myself worked up over this meeting. When I was a kid, parent-teacher conferences usually didn’t include the part about how awesome I was.

“Aren’t you nervous?” I asked Toby Joe on the walk over.

“Why should I be nervous?”

“Because this is a teacher-parent conference.” Like that answer alone would sum up years worth of my getting into trouble. “Oh, I forgot, you were an honorable student.”

Em’s teachers started off by saying how great he is. And I’m surprised when the tell me that he doesn’t kick them in the guts and face when they’re changing his diaper. And I’m surprised to find out that he listens to them—all of them.

Then we move on to goals.

“We’re going to work on his pronunciation.”

They had to come up with something attainable for a 19-month-old, suggesting he find Higgs boson is setting the kid up for failure.

“Is there something we can do to help?” I asked.

“Just repeat things to him—clearly.”

Toby and I looked at one another and had one of those silent conversations couples tend to have. Then he continued.

“Now, I realize that the word ‘paci’ is already a bastardization of another word, but what you’re saying is we shouldn’t find his pronunciation more charming than the real one. So using ‘bappy’ instead of ‘paci’ is doing nothing to help him when it comes to pronunciation.”

It’s not like they were suggesting that he’s slow or anything. I know they were just doing their job—possibly too well considering the age group. And I’m not at all surprised given the pressure they get from some parents. But we aren’t those parents.

“I’m not giving up bappy.” I said. “It’s way better than paci. And I’m not ready to give up datadoo either.”

And I’m certain, that after you’ve seen this video, you’ll agree.

Datadoo is going to be hard to let go of.

My Son Loves The Vacuum.

I have no idea how this happened, but Em loves the vacuum. He treats it like a pet. He requests I take it out of the closet at least once per day, which is kind of sad considering he might think we keep a pet in the closet. He likes the Dyson so much, he throws starts crying whenever it has to go “night night”. (I swear I didn’t start personifying the vacuum until after he developed an attachment to it.)

Babies are weird.

Emory Is Actually An Old Polish Man

This is how Emory reacts to the hammering taking place on the floor above. We have no idea where he got this from. But it totally reminds me of our previous neighbors and their pipe-banging antics.

My favorite part is where Toby Joe says, “STOP IT!” and Emory laughs, like, dude, that’s SO NOT THE WAY THIS IS DONE!

Em Dancin' To Ted Leo.

Emory dances a lot. He has two dances. The first one (which we can’t seem to capture on video) is by far my favorite. He shakes his head really fast from side to side until he gets dizzy and falls down. It’s truly one of the most outstanding things you’ll ever witness.

The video I have for you today features his other dance. This one is a little easier to capture because it lasts longer (since he doesn’t get dizzy right away). I love this one as well.

I’m two parts melancholy, three parts joyful today, so I thought this might be a perfect way to express as much. (You may watch Ted Leo play the song live here.)

CNN Outside Lehman Brothers Headquarters.

Forgive me for the horrible quality of this video. I don’t have the fancy equipment needed to do this. Plus, our TV died last week, so we’re using the 70-dollar tube we purchased from a Radio Shack in San Francisco. But it’s clear enough that I think you’ll get the point.

The United States woke up with a wicked financial hangover today. But I’m happy to see that at least these two guys are enjoying themselves. The nipple slurping is particularly unsettling.

Finding Comfort

It’s been a while. I have no excuse. The sounds you hear are of Em in the background playing with Tupperware, his new favorite toy.

(This is video for a series called Stories For My Son.)

Below is a video showing how Em uses the orange pillow, which is precisely how he acted with the woman from the story above.

The Goiker

I shot two videos today. The second one is an outtake. I simply had to include it because it’s damn funny.

The Final Video

The Outtake

I have to admit, recording these videos makes me feel entirely too self conscious. And if they’re difficult for me to watch, I can’t imagine how hard it is for the people I know (or don’t know). Or maybe this is just one of those examples where you’re overly critical of everything—like hearing your own voice on tape? Nevertheless, because of that weird feeling, they are really difficult for me to shoot knowing that I’ll put them online. I keep wondering how different and/or better or worse they’d be if I didn’t have the public part in mind. You see my dilemma?

Anyway, we’ll see. This project is still new and therefore being sculpted.

There Will Be Whiskey.

Today has been the longest day of my life. Maybe.

I realize I say “I haven’t been able to record a video today” and I’m saying as much on a video. I don’t have much of a rational mind left today. What more can I say. No excuse. Simple truth.

(See previous Stories For My Son here.)

Fudgepacking Happiness.

(Note to self: You know what’s funny about this one? This is the first video you took telling that particular story and when you totally derailed yourself midway through you went on to take a few more. Yet, after watching them all, you settled on this one because it’s more you and Emory will most likely appreciate that part someday—mistakes, fudgepacks and all. “Mama? What’s fudgepack?”)