NaBloPoMo: Writing From The Subway

I am writing this from my iPhone on my way home from school. I have less than two hours to finish a post for today.

So here’s some stream of consciousness.

N/R platform. 10:19 PM. Just leaving school. It smells of severely dehydrated bum piss and rat poisoning.

On train. It smells of booze and cheap perfume.

A man is passed out. Alive?

He’s breathing. Not dead.

14 TH street. Live subway band.

On L Train. It’s slammed. A man gets up to give me his seat. I take it.

Guys discussing a movie I haven’t seen. Trying not to listen.

Under the East River. That’s always weird.

Bedford Avenue.

Neighborhood is nuts. It’s not even 11 and people are already stumbling. Some may even be hungover. It’s so loud.

Plumes of smoke outside The Charleston. It always surprises me anyone under 40 still smokes.

Girls underdressed for this weather. Guys in skinny jeans, pointy shoes.

This neighborhood has more facial hair than Amish country.

Speaking of Blue Balls, Intercourse: she won’t sleep with that guy. And his chin, lips resemble a hairy vagina.

If she’s gay he may stand a chance at a kiss.

Do hairy vaginas exist anymore for the ladies of today?

Hello, I’m the annoying asshole “texting” while walking.

Straightedge kids at Vinnie’s.

Drunks everywhere else.

I used to drink among these people.

I don’t miss it.

I’m home now.

Goodnight, hairless vaginas and blokes without razors. Drink lots of water and keep an Advil by the bed


  1. I read this when you posted it last night. Loved it then and still love it today. :)


  2. ha ha ha ha ha.

    so many good quotes!


  3. In Aug. there was a big uproar when the adult film star Sasha Grey appeared on Entourage with a hairy vagina. Her response on twitter was this-

    “A lot of bush comments after tonight’s #Entourage episode. If you’re curious…that’s what a grown woman looks like. Besides, I shave where it counts. I’m happy to contribute to making it ok again:) All ‘fashions’ have their cycles!

    Since pron stars made the hairless vagina popular it’s going to take them to make the hairy vagina popular again.


    1. I saw that episode! And how much do I love her response?

      Yeah, this phenomenon of wanting women to look like a little girl is all kinds of disturbing if you ask me. Here’s to the 70s bush. BRING BACK THE 70s BUSH!


  4. I’m trying, I’m trying.


  5. i am in the NC highlands. Real country – need to drive 20 min for cell reception. I was a bit ashamed of my non hairy, but still quite fuzzy vagina, but the boy told me that every one here shaves. I also told him I was an atheist and he said it was better to tell people i was jewish as my reason for not going to one of the thousands of churches here. I whispered to him that i had voted for Obama, and he said i should keep that to myself.
    Best part about being here (well saddest also) – a much older man came to the cabin where i am staying (he was the one that gave me the key) and started hitting on me. He actually grabbed my left boob, tried to kiss me, and told me he wanted to have sex w/ a sexy young lady (36) like me. The boy I met knows this man and told me he was a baptist minister w/ a wife and many kids and grandkids. Once creepy man found out i met a local who knew him he couldnt look me in the eyes. Its kinda scary having so much power over someone. I could completely ruin his life if i wanted to, but i want to move here and dont want to be known as the girl who cried sexual harassment.


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