Tuesdays With Murray (Chapter 83)

We have a talking Elmo doll. In theory a talking Elmo doll is a great idea—like car alarms, scones and Communism—but if you apply a talking Elmo doll to everyday life, it quickly loses its greatness.

Talking Elmo talks a lot. He tells stories, laughs and dances whenever you press one of his buttons and there are a lot of buttons. I’ve heard the mantra linked to the button on his foot hundreds of times. Sometimes in the dead of night I find myself stuck in an infinite loop of mental chatter, repeating the phrase, “ELMO WANTS TO THINK OF JUST THE RIGHT STORY TO TELL YOU!” 

Elmo is driving me crazy.

Toby Joe and Emory have this little dance that they do in front of our giant Ikea clock. They call out the numbers and on every multiple of three they both do a little Cha-Cha-Cha! The Cha-Cha-Cha! includes a shoulder shake and a smile. Watching Emory do this dance is nothing short of awesome.  

The other day, Emory, Elmo, Murray and I were sitting on the floor together in a circle. Emory and I were playing with Elmo. Murray has always been curious about Elmo. I think he’s tying to figure out why this particular furry creature came with buttons. Murray often sits next to Elmo but he’s far too cool to interact with Elmo.

After Elmo finished up JUST THE RIGHT STORY TO TELL US, Emory pressed Elmo’s back button and Elmo began dancing, which made Emory start dancing, which then made me start dancing. The only person in our circle who wasn’t dancing was Murray.

Well, that would not fly, not with Emory. Everyone in our circle had to be dancing! So Emory reached over, took Murray by his shoulders and gently moved Murray’s shoulders from side to side.

I was unabashedly elated by this event and have decided that Elmo gets to live for at least another week.


  1. wait wait wait, back up. How can you say that scones don’t work as part of everyday life??! My God, I love scones…although I suppose if you ate them everyday they would make you very fat, and hence why your original statement, I’ll begrudingly admit, is correct. Bah.


  2. I would like to see a video of Emory dancing please.

    And, on your new site stuff. Did Toby use an MVC framework on it?


  3. Awwww…that made me smile. How sweet!!


  4. Cute cute cute! Need video, please!!


  5. Yes. Video. Please.
    I told all relatives that if they ever bought Lukas an Elmo the children to whom I would donate it would deeply appreciate it. I can’t stand Elmo’s voice, so we opted for the Cookie Monster TMX (They don’t have Cookie Monster in this new spiffy talker yet). Cookie Monster is more tolerable, but it gets old. My cat, Miss Boots is terrified of Lukas and all of his toys. She’s very delicate…and prissy.


  6. That makes me smile. I’m glad he’s enjoying it
    I am well aware Elmo can be annoying. We have Tickle me Elmo, Chicken dance Elmo, Hokie Pokie Elmo, and the one after that. I don’t remember what he’s called but now they’re on the top shelf in his closet tucked away. Quietly.


  7. hilarious! and adorable! jack received tickle-me elmo a few weeks ago and i think it was quite surprising for him to see elmo shrieking and writhing on the floor. the dog was also quite alarmed. and then it kind of freaked me out when elmo was able to electronically get back up on his two feet. it was as if he might suddenly join us at the dinner table as well.
    we put elmo back in the box for a while. small doses.


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