What About The Girls?

Last night Tobyjoe and I went to a Krav Maga class in Manhattan. I left work fifteen minutes beforehand, not the wisest idea. Taking a cab across town at rush hour is one of the most stressful commuting situations ever. When I arrived, I was already out of breath. I was also late.

Normally, being a little late wouldn’t matter. But I cut corners, corners I shouldn’t have cut. For example, I stupidly guessed that since we were taking an introduction to krav maga. It wouldn’t be too stressful. I wouldn’t have to move too much. So I didn’t change into a sports bra. When class began and we were asked to follow a very strict, and very fast warm-up routine, I was miserable and so were my boobs. It was unbelievably frustrating having them pop out all over the place. I hate boobs.

We worked out for about 20 minutes, doing 20 counts of each exercise. Jumping jacks. Sit-ups. Push-ups. Crunches. Ab-work. Run in place keeping your knees at a 90-degree angle. Run in place while kicking your own ass with them. Do it all over again. I’m not going to lie, it was rough. Sweat was pouring from everyone in the room.

After the warm-up, the first timers were brought to the front of the class where Rhon Mizrachi (whose name is actually listed over at wikipedia) gave us a brief history of krav maga and told us what his intentions were as a teacher. Then, he started to show us some basic movements. We started with legs and then worked onto the arms, exhaling with every action, inhaling with every retraction. It was incredible. It was one of the best workouts I have ever had.

The last exercise and the most active, was one where we were taught how to fight our way out of a tight strangulation. No matter how strong someone is, no matter how tight a grip the perpetrator may have on you, this maneuver is designed to release you no matter how strong you are. It has to be done immediately. Now, pair the maneuver with a firm kick to the groin, you’re not only set free, but they’re down for a few as well.

We were paired up. I took Toby immediately. First, it was my turn to do the strangulation and his turn to get out of it. On the very first try, what does he go and do? He knees me square in the crotch. SMASH!

I almost hit the floor. Had I had balls, I’d have been down for at least an hour.

Later, when Rhon told us all to buy cups, a small African American woman said, “What about the girls?

6 Comments

  1. I’m assuming that Toby wasn’t actually suposed to kick you in the cooch.
    I hope.

    Reply

  2. Well, if I were like really strangling him, then yes, he was supposed to knee me in the cooch. But we were merely playing, learning, acting. Yet he STILL kneed me in the cooch.

    later, when I fell on him on the L Train, I said, “sorry, I fell into you.”

    He replied, “That’s OK, I kicked your crotch.” And we both laughed and laughed. I think I have a get out of jail free card for a bit with this crotch incident.

    Reply

  3. I can’t let your sports-bra-less incident pass without making sure you’ve seen the sports-bra site with the simulated bouncing boobs, customizable for different sizes and activity levels.

    Reply

  4. Katie, that’s awesome. I hadn’t seen it before. It’s kinda hard to stop watching. :]

    Reply

  5. That’s awesome! My best friend from HS (and still good friend), Shawn Burgo (http://www.kravmaga-southend.com/about.htm), co-runs a school up in Boston (http://www.kravmaga-southend.com/). It’s totally changed his life.

    I’ve been wanting to jump in myself, but It got this knee thing and my back keeps acting up and the other day my ankle starting…

    Reply

  6. In everyday life across the world, potential dangers abound that may bring harm to an individual. Self-defense training may offer a means to protect oneself from assault. Krav Maga is one of many systems that offer training in self-defense. Thanks for sharing your krav maga training experience. That’s awesome

    Reply

Leave a Reply