Three Down, Seven To Go.

I started writing a long, long post about yesterday. And then it began to bore me. So I’m certain it’d have bored everyone else as well.

Some of you may or may not remember the story from about three years ago where I cut my pointer finger so badly they had to remove the fingernail and sew the skin from the left-hand-side of the finger into what was left of the nail bed. Yeah, that hurt. Maybe this will jog your memory:

Well, yesterday, I did it again. This time, I got my thumbnail. It wasn’t nearly as bad, but I did manage to cut off half of my thumbnail and a section of my thumb. The good news is I didn’t get many stitches. The bad news is, it was because there wasn’t enough actual affected skin to do so. The even worse news is I severed some of the nerves so I can’t really feel the tip of my thumb. But that’s OK, because 7 years ago, I severed the nerves on my right thumb and I managed to live through that.

I cut myself at 3:30. My nail was glued back into place by 6 PM. Eventually it will fall off. I’m fine with that. After all, I was the one who begged them NOT to remove my fingernail. I am not sure I want to live through that again. While having a nail removed doesn’t actually hurt, dealing with the aftermath, in fact, does.

The worst part, by far, was the anesthesia. They really dig into you with those needles. Anesthesia is very painful and annoying. I have no idea how I will ever survive Novocain should I ever have to get it. Ouch. I found it humorous that when something is numbed from anesthesia, it feels unbelievably HUGE. My thumb felt like a giant fleshy appendage. Weird. I also found the fact that for ONE stitch, she inserted three needles worth of anestetia. Looking back, I almost wish I had dealt with the suture and the cleansing sans the numbing agent.

Today, I am sore. My finger is throbbing. My nail has been glued into some sort of workable position. My eyes burn. I am sleepy. I would love to hear about other horror stories because, well, misery loves company.


  1. Why does your wristband say “shellfish”? Do the hospitals in NYC serve shrimp to their patients?


  2. That was from DC. When she mentioned she was allergic to iodine or something like that, they wrote “Shellfish” on her wristband.


  3. That was taken the last time. This time, I hit my thumb. I didn’t get pictures this time around.

    last time, they asked me if I was allergic to anything and I said, “Maybe Iodine as a few times I have had an allergic reaction to stored shellfish.” And the nurse wrote down shellfish. Like I’d be more likely to come in contact with shellfish at an ER rather than Iodine.


    This time, I just had my name on it.


  4. I linked to that story above. But here it is again.


  5. Do you have comment moderation on? I just left a long comment and it is nowhere to be found!
    I don’t wanna type it again! LOL.


  6. Toby’s on it, babydoll.


  7. I’m sorry to hear that you tried to chop off another finger. That had to really hurt. You know, I remember when you wrote about when you did it to your other finger back in DC. Wow! I have been reading your blog that long now!!! :o) My day isn’t complete unless I check in with Mihow on a daily basis! :o)


  8. Sarah, no record of your comment. I am so sorry.

    Mesh, yeah, me too. While I know it comes with the career, I’m sick of it. At least I’m not a chef. I went to NYU medical. The doc said they get a lot of chefs who cut off entire fingers a lot of the time. You’d have to be one strong son of a bitch to chop off a finger with an exacto.

    I’m in a horrible mood today. I’m pissed off at the world. I hope it doesn’t show.

    I saw a guy jump into a deli at 9 AM and steal a can of beer from the ice bin near the door. I told on him. And they looked at me like I WAS the crazy one.

    People are assshits today. All of them. :]


  9. shellfish-
    i am so sorry you hurt yourself.
    i wish i had a story to share.
    i pulled off my big toenail once.
    that hurt so bad, i passed out.
    thats about as bad a story as ive got.
    my brother dropped the tv on it. like a coffee table with a tv in it. we were bored. it was summer. and we were living in arizona. we were watching flash gordon for the hundredth or so time. we liked to lay on our stomaches, faces in hands, right up close to the thing and watch it. i saw a wolf spider, which if you havent see one, looks like a hairy hockey puck. my brother for some reason thought the only thing fit to smash an insect that size was the tv.
    i think that was the logic. they always called him the genius. my job was to chase the thing towards the behemoth tv. and then smash. bye bye spidey. only it was smash, screams and then everything went black.
    this is why i am not a mover.


  10. Okay, since you’re in a bad mood today, I’ll retype my comment from earlier. Cause I love you like that. ;-)
    I’m sorry you hurt yet another finger! Your poor digits!
    I have sliced into each of my index fingers two different times. First time I was 16 and working in a convenience store (WaWa). I was slicing tomatoes on the meat slicer (a big no-no). I went to mop up some juice with a cloth withOUT turning off the slicer (another big no-no). BAM! It happened very fast, a nice slice, fortunately perpendicular to my fingernail! There was blood everywhere, and it required 5 stitches.
    The next time was in my twenties, working in a warehouse. I sliced the other finger with an exacto blade while opening a box. The slice was exactly the same as the first time; just a different finger. Again, 5 stitches.
    The needle prodding into the open wound to inject lidocaine SUCKS. It hurts like hell. The one and only time I got novacaine at the dentist, I vowed never again. Having a needle jabbed into my gums over and over hurt much worse than any cavaties I had filled without the drugs before or since!

    I hope your day gets better.


  11. Heather, but you are a shaker, baby! A SHAKER!

    Sarah, you’re a peach. So, you suggest having NO Novocain while getting a cavity filled? I wish they’d just knock me out and call it a day. I hate that shit. Hell, just have my teeth removed. All of them. I don’t think I could deal with that.


  12. Well, I’ve been lucky in that the cavaties I’ve had were not very deep. The pain was brief, in other words, so I could handle it. I’d rather have a few short moments of pain that will be over soon, than have half my face numb for the entire day followed by pain.
    That said, if I had to have serious work done on my teeth? I’d insist on being knocked out. I am terrified of having a tooth pulled.

    Totally unrelated to this post:
    I thought of you when my dear friend Charlie wrote this post today because of things you’ve said in regards to the pro-life movement. Check it out and let me know what you think:


  13. If your dentist is good, the novocain injections don’t need to be that uncomfortable. I’m a total wimp and cringe at the thought of dental work, but I’ve had dentists give blocks that were almost painless. Less painful than accidentally biting the inside of your cheek.


  14. Umm, Chele…I seem to remember another time in SC that dad and I had to rush you to the hospital with a cut finger. I believe you did it on a cut glass.

    My poor baby!!!


  15. Yeah, each time I react the same way, too. This time I merely said (and eerily calmly) “I just cut myself badly.” My coworker says it with a british accent. The last time, in DC, I walked into my coworkers office and said “I think I just cut myself.”

    That time, I called you and said. I cut myself. But I’m not getting stitches. All I know is when Ryan got home, the cat was covered in blood. Oh, and there was a blizzard.



  16. “assshits”. Hah. 3 s’s! Bravo!

    Novocaine injections are not that bad. Usually they put a topical on the area so you don’t really feel it. My dentist, who is a teaching dentist, jiggles my cheek (yeah, that’s right) when he sticks me. He asked his student why he was doing that. It’s because it takes some of the pain & nervousness away. Remember that advice, jiggle before you stick.

    That all said, last time I had a small bruise on the outside of my face, a few days after the fact. Not from the jiggling, from the sticking. Not that anyone noticed, but I liked telling people I got punched in the jaw.


  17. P.S. I hope you feel better.

    Did anyone ever see “Adventures in Babysitting”? The “one stitch” made me think of that. Don’t fuck with the Lords of Hell, etc.


  18. Missy, thanks for making me laugh out loud. I love it when that happens.

    My doctor when I was a little tot (incidentally, one of the first memories I have) used to SPANK MY ASS before inserting the needle. He said this was his way of diverting the kids’ attention from the needle pricking. the irony here is I vividly remember this mother humper smacking my bare ass.

    Did it work? Hell yes. I have no recollection of the actual needle. I will, however, remember him forever.


  19. my guess is “ouch” doesn’t quite cover it


  20. outch – hope you feel better today.

    i cut into my index finger once before work trying to cut off the last slice of a really hard and dark bread. not a good idea. i cut into it almost where the nail ends. and also a tad into the nail = half through my finger. luckily i only needed five stitches and they saw in an x-ray that i had just missed the bone. the feeling in my fingertip actually came back almost perfectly over time. also, i buy my bread sliced now…

    get better :)


  21. Yesterday I went through yet another bone marrow aspirate (where they stick a large needle into your hip bone,remove the core of the needle, and the needle is pressed forward and rotated in both directions, forcing a tiny sample of the bone marrow into the needle)NOT FUN! I tell my oncologist that it feels like im a wind up doll and he is turning the key. Now imagine that stupid anesthesia going right into your ass! I’d complain more but the drugs they give you after the fact are too good.


  22. Hi there. I came across your blog in googling “finger cuts stitches and nerves.”

    I’ve recently has a little accident of my own… My godson wanted me to jab holes into his snailbox, and i did…and the knife slipped…and andandd there was so much blood! my goodness was there blood. literal bloodbath!

    No, not really. I wrapped a wad of tissue around it and got taken to the emergency room where, of course, i was tended too only after filling out a bunch of insurance papers whilst bleeding onto the carpet. I fainted and the nurse put me onto a bed which she elevated at my head (retard.)The doctor was an ass, and incompetent. He kept on telling the nurse he doesn't have the right scissors or needle, but continued to sew it up anyway. that was reassuring. Oh well, another imperfection that will forever remain a part of me. its my middle finger ( left hand). I make sure to keep it elevated :)

    Anyway, I’m sorry for getting a bit carried away there, but I’m rather worried about my finger. I have very little feeling in the last segment (tip) and I was wondering whether it’ll ever return. The cut itself is not healing too well… I got antibiotics and a tetnus shot, but it’s been over a week and it still looks ghastly. It still pulsates with pain especially at night. You mentioned that 7 years ago you had almost decapitated your finger—has the feeling returned? Any suggestions in tending to it after the stitches are removed?

    I’d really appreciate any insight.

    Take care. Hope your finger heals soon.



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