Yesterday, as I was drifting off to sleep, I came up with what I deemed at the time as the most brilliant idea I have had ever. If this idea were being graded, I would have received an A.
A few days ago, I was a part of yet another internet disturbance. It wasn’t that I instigated it, quite the contrary. But either way I was left feeling kinda bad yet again. (There should really be a new word surrounding this phenomenon. But I need to keep my priorities in order. And today, it’s all about The Mark.) Basically, someone said something, I said something back and then someone else said something written entirely in ALL CAPS. It was harsh, but sarcastic nonetheless. And while I know that sarcasm does not an attack make, my skin is about as thin and transparent as Paris Hilton when it comes to online bruising; I don’t take to it too well.
On that same day, I was chatting with Toby on AIM and I wrote something sarcastic. He took it as an attack and the next thing you know we’re on the phone apologizing for absolutely nothing. This happens often, I have found. It’s even more annoying now that a lot of human interaction is moving to this thing called the Internet.
Yesterday, I came up with an idea; and that idea spawned the birth of SARCASMARK.
You see, SARCASMARK is a mark one must add to the end of the sentence much like a period (shown here: .), an exclamation point (shown here: !), and a question mark (shown here: ?). It’s a new punctuation mark. I think we’re about due for a new one. At least that’s the state of my Union.
Instantly, I faced a few parameters:
- 1). SARCASMARK must be found on the keyboard.
- 2). SARCASMARK MUST be used anytime something is said in a sarcastic tone while on the internet. There are NO excuses.
- 3). SARCASMARK must be used sparingly. (In other words, none of this !!!!!! LOL!!!!! OMG!!!!!! WTF????? bullshit. Practice some punctuation conservation. I’m trying to kick my comma habit, I ask the same for all you !!!!! lovers out there. Pretend your punctuation resources are limited.)
- 4). SARCASMARK is to be used with no other punctuation. One mark per sentence (see above.)
I hope we’re all on the same page now. So, without further ado, I give you SARCASMARK^
Toby mentioned something about having to say that something is to the somethingth power and then what do you do? But, I mean, really. How often does that happen on the Internet? Maybe somewhere tucked between conversations about your mother’s vagina, the Nikon D70, farting, your very own penis, and how gay people are ruining the world there is room for something like this, but I highly doubt it.
I seriously think this could change the world