I Lost a Finger and Gained a Leg.

Yesterday actually got worse. I was hurrying to finish mocking up a new project, handling an exacto blade is something I’ve done for years. But yesterday I cut my finger so badly and in such and odd manner I was forced to have half of my fingernail removed. 3 ER doctors, numerous shots of numbing power (two which didn’t work, so I nearly kicked someone in the head as they began to remove my nail), 1 tetanus shot, who knows how many stictches (2, in which, were through the remaining fingernail [yes, they CAN do that]) and 5 hours later, I had a numb pointer-finger and one, massive headache.

My gimphinger won’t work for many weeks. So my posts will be short, at least for a while. (Thank goodness, right?). I did have to “relieve” one ER student of his duties after he hit bone. That’s a story for when I can type. Ugh. What a fucking day.

I did return home to find this, however, so all was not lost.

It’s early now. I have A LOT of catching up to do, hence my early arrival. Tell me stories of your worst painful experience. This most certainly was mine.


  1. one
    yeek! sorry bout the fingah! sounds like some crazy insane crap…

    wait wait wait. the lamp is real?


    i am sooo breaking into your apartment now…


  2. somehow, you thought I was JOKING?! My dear boy, I would never joke about the leglamp.


  3. getting to your request though:

    when i was in 6th grade i lived in kansas and the winds would get going really fast sometimes because it’s all flat and crap. so, my family was going to the mall one day in the winter and it was a cold day but most of the snow we had gotten had melted, but when there had been snow there had been plenty of ice so they had sanded and salted like mad. well, the wind was blowing and there was a patch of piled up sand near the mall entrance and the wind blew some tiny gravel across the little walkway that managed to get behind my glasses and scratched my eye. my actual eye, like the white part, not the eyelid. oh did that ever suck. it hurt for several hours and eventually my mom took me to the emergency room at the air force base there and they had to hook up this rig that looked like something out of a sci-fi movie to my eye. it was like a giant contact lens with a little tube attachment on it that went over my eye under the eyelid, then they hooked a big long tube up to it and hooked it up to an IV bag full of saline solution and flooded my eye to clean it for a while and gave me a bottle of presecription eye drops i had to take for a few weeks…


  4. Dude, eye stories are the worst. Some guy yesterday was in the ER with his eye all wrapped up and blood and all. I still wonder what happened to him.


  5. I think I am pretty fortunate w/r/t pain. The worst incident I can think of is when I broke my big toe by dropping the base of a halogen lamp on it. Fucking A that hurt. I think that’s the closest I’ve come to blacking out (for non-drinking reasons, natch).


  6. awww, mihow, I’m sorry about your finger. Ouch.


  7. Mihow’s real name is “Shellfish”?!? ;)

    Actually, sorry to hear about your accident. That did not look pleasant, though it sounds like you have a least some sense of humor about it.

    As for painful experiences, one just has to read my blog during the summer for weekly updates. I think the worst one was probably a couple of years ago when my bike slid out from under me in a hairpin turn, resulting in me skidding down 40 feet of asphalt. The wound on my elbow was bad enough to make the doctor wince and the pharmacist exclaim, “My god, man, what did you do to yourself?!?”


  8. Not a painful, but an uncomfortable experience: I emailed my sister to ask a favor of her for a grad school application. Only afterward did I look on her website and find out she almost sliced a finger off the previous day.

    Whoops. Hope you feel better.


  9. yuppie, if you can wait a bit, I can help you out.

    Tom, I was wondering when/if someone would bring that up. That’s the funniest story.

    I was waiting to go in, the pre-nurse person says “allergic to anything?” I say, “Shellfish and other stuff I’m not sure of.” She says, “Oh, iodine.” I say, “Yes, that’s true.”

    So she writes “Shellfish” on my armband because well, you know, I have more of a chance of finding shellfish in an ER than say, iodine. :]


  10. when i was in first or second grade my mom took me to burger king. there was some promotion where if you said some phrase they would give you something and i was all psyched about it, as kids are wont to be. but i was shy and easily distracted and i was walking back and forth along the front of the counter and sliding my hand underneath it and mom was like “i’m not saying it, you have to come say it” and then i got the worlds biggest sliver ever from the bottom of their counter. it got wedged between the fingernail and the skin underneath and was long enough to run the entire length of the nail and still be sticking out past the end of it a little bit. i remember being in the car and it hurting and crying and my mom being like “i can pull it out, or we can go to the emergency room” and the emergency room scared me even more* so i had her pull it out. thing was huge. seriously…

    just before xmas the year before we had gone to the emergency room because i was having allergy/asthma problems and they wound up admitting me and keeping me there for a few days on an IV and shit. i hate needles…


  11. I once had a cabinet door corner enter the top of my head, but thank goodness, they can’t really stitch that nonsense. It bled man. boy did it bleed.


  12. Nifkin, do you have any idea how much you could have sued B king for?

    Not that I condone that type of behavior. But well, anything to put Fast Food out of business.

    So do it again. Now. Please.


  13. When I was 12, I ate a Big Mac too soon after having my tonsils out (again – damn those fast food restaurants!) I ended up breaking open the stitches. Finally, after spitting up blood for hours while my Dad snored away on the floor next to me – they took me to the hospital at 2 a.m. I ended up projectile vomiting all of the blood that ihad swallowed and needed to go back into surgery. Has anyone ever seen how big a tube they use to pump your stomach??


  14. sweet cow, that’s horrid. horrid.


  15. Yea – it really was! I haven’t had a Big Mac since!


  16. Poor Lady! I hope everyone is being extra nice to you at work since you maimed yourself doing work for them.

    I assumed Shellfish on your band was some sort of nickname Toby had given you and he had written it on your the wristband for some reason. like Mi-shellfish. I guess not.

    Also the cabinet door gave me a flashback:
    Many many moons ago Mihow and I lived in the dumpiest of apartments. One day she was sitting against the wall and a framed picture slid down the wall directly onto her head. She was mad. I laughed and laughed.

    In the same apartment the glass kitchen light fixture fell and broke on top of my head.

    Haunted?? You be the judge.


  17. Didn’t Mihow also fall off of a roof?

    (Nico, now I don’t feel so bad about laughing so hard when she called me last night to tell me about her finger.)


  18. ha ha ha!

    I remembered the light fixture but not the frame. That’s funny!

    I must not have been truly mad. I’m sorry if I was bitchy.


  19. I did fall from a roof. Drunker than hell. But that time it was Soung who laughed and laughed.


  20. At BD4D just this past October I was helping clean up afterwards, and pick up a projecter screen. A huge chunk of metal, about an inch and a half long embedded itself in my finger, and shattered inside.

    I decided I’d wait for it to get infected so it would push the pieces out. I’ve never been very smart when it comes to my body.

    So eventually it does get infected, and I end up having to have surgery on my finger. The doctor claims that anaesthetic wouldn’t work properly and would be more painful than the actual surgery, so I do this without any drugs.

    About a week later it gets infected again, and out pops a chunk of metal the doctor missed in surgery. I have a scar now, and it doesn’t seem to be going away.


  21. “I assumed Shellfish on your band was some sort of nickname Toby had given you”

    Nico, knowing your sick mind, and assuming it’s like to my own sick mind, you’re a dirty girl!

    I would allow no such nickname!


  22. No! You are the dirty one! But I wish I had thought of it…


  23. musta been about 12 or 13 when my family moved to maryland. we were unpacking all the boxes and such. and we had these very tall wardrobe boxes you could hang clothes in, you see they had this metal upside down U shaped bar that the hangers went on.. well once all of the clothes were taken out of the boxes i was breaking them down.. this one box had its metal upside down U shaped bar of death in the bottom of the box, so i reached down as far as my arm would go in a 4 ft tall box and promptly slit the nice soft flesh where your thumb meets your palm. bled and bled.. 5 stitches.


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