Mihow

Quorn

—

by

Mihow
in

Last night Toby and I were discussing Quorn Products as sometimes I kind of miss their chicken and we started to discuss how they made them, with some sort of man-made fungus and all, spores and stuff and I became gaggy and asked him to stop. So I guess, for now, I’ll live without the Quorn until I know it’s safe and “normal”. However, the mention of the word “spore” and the word “fungus” got us (or me, rather) on the topic of how the name Quorn sounds and how it sort of fits with what it turned out to be. And it got us talking about words like “warts”, “snot”, “hemorrhoids”, “corns” and the like. And I was slightly put off by the fact that these word sound as gross and disgusting and unappealing as they are. Toby said,

Well, right now, rename “wart”. If you don’t like it, rename it.

I said

skyke

So from now on, those with what was once a wart, now have a “skyke”. It sounds better. And I also decided that Chlamydia is a much better VD to acquire than say… Gonorrhea or Herpes. And Syphilis is ok as well. (Judging by the sound of them, of course). What would you like to rename? What words bother you?

Comments

38 responses to “Quorn”

  1. Megan Avatar
    Megan

    The word “moist” bothers me. It’s funny, ‘cause on Jeopardy the other day, they had the topic “Moist Things.” I guess David Letterman had a top 10 of topics that would never be on Jeopardy, and just to spite him, Alex Trebeck had it on there. Or the writers on the show did, rather.

    I hearby cancel the word moist. You can now only use the word ‘damp.’

    Other words I hate:
    1) creamy
    2) catsup (it’s fuckin’ ketchup, ok?)
    3) goiter

    Like

    Reply
  2. becca Avatar
    becca

    megan, it’s funny that you said moist, because i can’t stand that word either. can’t even say it.

    Like

    Reply
  3. katie Avatar
    katie

    ‘goiter’ sounds like it has a built-in New Jersey accent.

    Like

    Reply
  4. freakgirl Avatar
    freakgirl

    “Chlamydia” sounds pretty. Like, “Hello, this is my daughter, Chlamydia.”

    There aren’t many words that I can’t stand. The only one that really pushes my buttons is the word “retard” used as an insult. And that’s more MY deal, not because it sounds weird, language-wise.

    Does that make ANY sense?

    Like

    Reply
  5. arjen Avatar
    arjen

    “skyke” sounds nasty too. unless you pronounce it as “nike”

    theres something joyfull in nasty words though. like “pus” and “snot”. hehe.

    goiter sounds like someone with a cockney accent actually. or swedish:

    “Goiter knckebr

    Like

    Reply
  6. andrea Avatar
    andrea

    top 3 words i cant stand:
    1. panties ….just don’t like it
    2. c*nt…..see, can’t even spell it out, i dislike it so much
    3. tits…..reminds me of pigs and sows

    Like

    Reply
  7. Megan Avatar
    Megan

    Oooo….panties. Good one, Andrea.
    And pus is a totally gross word, too, Arjen. Look at the European pull through for us! ;)

    The “c-word,” as I refer to it, bothers me, too.

    Like

    Reply
  8. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    see, now I like the word Cnt. I think it’s funny. I used to call my friend, Soung a cnt as a term of endearment. Twas funny.

    I actually wrote about hating the word “moist” before on here. I started to today and then erased it for fear of repeating myself.

    But if you’d like, you can take a look at my friend’s moist panties.

    Like

    Reply
  9. Megan Avatar
    Megan

    GAH!

    Take a look at my friend’s DAMP panties, thank you. ;)

    My mom, when she gets really, really mad, says the c-word. Even moms use it. How disturbing is that?!

    Twat is funny. The C-word is…mmm…not so much.

    Like

    Reply
  10. becca Avatar
    becca

    twat is SO funny. how about the word munch? can’t stand that one either.

    Like

    Reply
  11. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    The word “thyroid” bothers me too.

    munch is ok because I like to say “assmunch” to people I am teasing.

    Twat is funny indeed.

    Like

    Reply
  12. LAKe Avatar
    LAKe

    The other “c” word, as well as ‘snatch’!!
    Pocket book, hanky and slacks all make me laugh!

    Like

    Reply
  13. freakgirl Avatar
    freakgirl

    “slacks.” I HATE that word.

    Like

    Reply
  14. nico Avatar
    nico

    I once saw a pamphlet titled Chlamydia – It’s Not a Flower. So true.

    I love love love the word cunt. It is really the only effective word in certain situations.

    I hate titties – it reminds me of diminutive perving men pawing at well, titties.

    I also dislike snack, mylar, and slacks.

    Like

    Reply
  15. nico Avatar
    nico

    I don’t like yogurt either, and especially if it is spelled yoghurt, or however it is spelled with an ‘h’.

    Like

    Reply
  16. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    Nico, you always make me laugh. It could be a flower, that’s my point. Let’s make Chlamydia a flower. I’ll name my next kitten Chlamydia.

    It’s nice to hear other women like the word cunt. I agree, it puts an end to most babble in most situations.

    Mylar?! you’re weird.

    Like

    Reply
  17. freakgirl Avatar
    freakgirl

    It has taken me a long time to come to terms with the word “cunt.” I still don’t care for it, but only because it’s considered the ULTIMATE INSULT.

    I just remembered a word I don’t like. Snatch. I don’t know.

    Like

    Reply
  18. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    It’s those “ar” “ur” “or” sounds. What might it be? Does it come from on of our first sounds, “gurgle?” hmmmmm I am not of knowing.

    I hate the word “boobies” but like the word “clit”

    Like

    Reply
  19. LAKe Avatar
    LAKe

    Even seeing that word in writing makes my skin crawl!!!!!!!!!!
    Cunt is the best word EVER.

    Like

    Reply
  20. nico Avatar
    nico

    I don’t like mylar because it sounds like it should be stretched out like myyyyyylaaaarr.
    Why that is annoying to me, I can’t say.

    I like snatch, I actually think it is cute. Like a little grabby animal. (That is probably not so cute to many – but it is to me!)

    Like

    Reply
  21. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    I don’t mind the word snatch either. I kinda like mylar, though. I think because I like when i’m able to use it in a printed piece. (mylar/velum).

    OH! Fornicate. No me gusta.

    Like

    Reply
  22. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    LAKe, “Even seeing that word in writing makes my skin crawl!!!!!!!!!!”

    Which word do you speak of?

    Like

    Reply
  23. tobyjoe Avatar
    tobyjoe

    i swear i have known at least 5 girls in my life, aside from present company, who cringe at the words “moist” and “panties”

    i dare you to find a guy who cringes at those two words (invalid if you add the words “of Oprah”)

    Like

    Reply
  24. tobyjoe Avatar
    tobyjoe

    nico – george kills little grabby animals, from what i understand… drowns them or something…. so beware!

    Like

    Reply
  25. LAKe Avatar
    LAKe

    The cl*t word!

    Like

    Reply
  26. nico Avatar
    nico

    no toby, George tries to RESCUE little grabby animals. he gives them mouth to mouth. heh heh

    Like

    Reply
  27. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    ha ha!

    What an awesome visual memory of George chasing a duckling no taller than the first eye on his shoe. That duck ran and ran and jumped head first into the pond while George tried, on last time, to grab him, pushing the little guy under water for a few seconds. Holy crap that was funny.

    Like

    Reply
  28. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    ha ha!

    What an awesome visual memory of George chasing a duckling no taller than the first eye on his shoe. That duck ran and ran and jumped head first into the pond while George tried, one last time, to grab him, pushing the little guy under water for a few seconds. Holy crap that was funny.

    Like

    Reply
  29. tobyjoe Avatar
    tobyjoe

    oh lordy lordy lord lord…

    the thing to remember: THEY STILL DIE!

    LAKe, there is no more beautiful word. Get back to the nunnery, freak!

    Like

    Reply
  30. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    My new project will be creating a female superhero named CLITWOMAN.

    Indeed. She’s fuckin tear shit up.

    Power to Clitwoman. Clitwoman, she’ll take all ya’all on.

    Like

    Reply
  31. nico Avatar
    nico

    OH the duckling! I thought you mean the hedgehog rescue attempt.

    The duck-what an embarrasment! It was like of Mice and Men. And he was SO jealous because there were a couple kids who had managed to GENTLY scoop up baby ducks.

    Like

    Reply
  32. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    I’m crying….

    Of Mice and Men.

    Crying. Holy shit, hadn’t thought of that.

    “I Want to pet the rabbits.”

    Like

    Reply
  33. katie Avatar
    katie

    ‘masticate’ and ‘defenestrate’ sound like they should mean something dirty. I can’t imagine using them, other than maybe to confuse people.

    Like

    Reply
  34. GotJesus? Avatar
    GotJesus?

    i wonder what sort of hits you’ll get from google now, given this conversation. I can see the search string now: “moist duckling cunt”

    Like

    Reply
  35. mihow Avatar
    mihow

    Oh my dear. “moist duckling cunt” is the song title from Clitgirl’s first EP.

    (That’s clitwoman’s sidebitch, btw). Ahhhhh superhero lesbians. Gotta love em.

    What kind of superpowers would they have?

    ::returns can-opener to drawer::

    Like

    Reply
  36. LAKe Avatar
    LAKe

    Even though I don’t like the cl—word – don’t I get any credit for using cunt on a daily basis??

    Like

    Reply
  37. arjen Avatar
    arjen

    I know someone who refers to a certain unnamed area of the body as the “taint”. that word has disturbed me ever since.

    Like

    Reply
  38. arjen Avatar
    arjen

    ps.
    how does someone in the right mind design a big flash intro and 10 desktops in 3 hours?
    help

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to mihow Cancel reply