Ladies Locker roo

I am not a naked person. Not at all. And so when a stranger stands before me in the locker room naked, nipples sitting there staring up at me, and says,

It is SO HUMID outside! I mean, could it be any more HUMID?!

I have trouble looking her in the eye. I’m thinking

Oh Shit! Am I supposed to LOOK at you? Am I supposed to ANSWER you? Is it rude if I don’t look at you? Do you want me to look at you?! OH NO! STOP! Please put your naked away!

And it appears that it may have just been me. I was the one hiding in the corner, two towels beneath an obvious fear, trying to figure out how I can put my bra on without having to take the towel off.

If I slip my shorts up this way, I won’t have to show them any of my ass.

I’m the person freaking out over being naked in a room full of women. Me. They’re fine with it. They can even talk to you, boobs and all. And so here, I’m learning how to act in the locker room. I mean, it’s not ok to stare, right? Even if they’re looking at you, you shouldn’t stare, (just look away). And its bad to avoid all eye-contact, right? Is it considered rude and somehow freakish? It’s natural to be curious of what other women look like so I can’t help but let my eyes pull over every so often, stop, take a rest and then move on. It’s curiosity. Maybe that’s why some talk, so it’s ok to look. I don’t know. I’m not sure I’m mature enough for the ladies locker room. My boobs don’t like coming out and my ass is a turtle, an albino turtle. And I’m going to try it again today.

10 Comments

  1. Would you like some cheese with that whine?

    Try doing that in a gym full of gay guys (when you’re a guy). Try getting changed when someone is using the body lotion, and seems to be spending quite a bit of time in one area (don’t worry, I don’t think there was any arousal… he just liked that one
    area).

    Some people are more comfortable with their nudity than others – and no one really cares what other people do. Some are really shy and do whatever to prevent any glimpse. Others don’t care. Just do what you’re comfortable with and take pictures of all the hotties. Please.

    Reply

  2. ha ha ha

    toby asked me to do the same thing. he wants me to try and sell them online. BIG BUCKS!

    (for the record, Google God, I am only kidding).

    Reply

  3. Next time that guy does that just say, “It rubs the lotion on the skin or it gets the hose again.”

    Over and over again.

    Reply

  4. I told you not to join the gym.

    Kids today. They don’t listen.

    Reply

  5. Naked girls hanging out talking in a locker
    room is like a “Porkies” film. I’m with
    ya, Mihow. Just go on with your bad self.
    Just don’t work out wearing a thong under your shorts. I made that mistake once
    and wooo! Uncomfortable.

    Reply

  6. you should totally wear a strap-on in the locker room.

    that’s what dear Yuppie does, after all.

    if it works for the guys at his gym, it should work for the girls in yours.

    Reply

  7. I so hear you with the naked thing. I cannot be casually naked, nor have a casual conversation naked. I try to hide when I have to change in that situation, and I feel immediately stupid. Like, do I have the special nipples, or something? I must keep them hidden at all costs! They are a government secret! I don’t know.

    Reply

  8. So I went over lunch and again, lots of naked people. I should just join ‘em. one girl was standing there, in front of the mirror, applying make up and preparing her hair (blow drying, etc) in nothing but shoes!

    twas odd.

    Reply

  9. what hair was she drying?

    HUH?

    HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

    GET IT?????????!!!!!!!????

    Reply

  10. Tobyjoe, you are soooooooo fired.

    Reply

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