Best movie quotes ever. GO!!!

You know me, I’m just like you, it’s 3 in the morning, and I don’t know anybody

I don’t know what his damn jammies looked like…they had Yodas and shit on them.”

(leave out the titles for now, I want to create things that bug me).


  1. ”…If Plato is a fine red wine, Aristotle is a dry martini…”


  2. dude, where’s my car?


  3. “Who are those guys?”


  4. oh no. i just can’t. there is too much. instead, consider this: anybody ever watch too much eddie izzard, then go around quoting him in everyday conversation? and no one knows what the hell is wrong w/ you? except maybe one or two people? and they are annoyed w/ the constant eddie izard-ness? yeah, me neither.

    i’m not even supposed to be here today.


  5. “I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen.”

    “Damn, bitch, you messed up my Cabbage Patch!”

    “Yo, baby, ever have your ass licked by a
    man in a trenchcoat?”

    “Do we really have to listen to this vagina music all the way there?”

    “I can’t believe I gave my panties to a geek.”

    “If you were any more white, you would be clear.”

    “Look at me. Jerking off in the shower. This will be the highlight of my day.”


  6. And Resa, WORD.

    “hukka hukka hukka….Lobster.”


  7. bunch of flowers.


  8. freakgirl, if my brother hadn’t just been married, I would be so trying to hook you two up right now.

    that quote from Say Anything was his favorite for a long time.


  9. but his wife rules and she’s pretty hot too.


  10. that’s always the way it is for freakgirl. :: crying ::

    hee hee


  11. That wasn’t a quote (btw)

    “I can’t remember if i started drinking because my wife left me, or if my wife left me because I started drinking.”


  12. “I’m trying to use the phone!”


  13. “Which came first


  14. I am going to guess all of these with out looking any of them up. I will do so tomorrow. There are three that are bugging the hell out of me at the moment.


  15. …….and if your love is truly giving , it will come back 10-fold .

    That’s really insightful

    I know , it was Jerry Springer’s final thought on friday’s show


  16. Toby, I just spit water all over my computer.


  17. “are you cool now?”
    kicks trash can
    “yeah, i’m cool.”

    “and it’s not education bullshit, if that’s your argument i have three words for you: ‘learn to fucking type’.”

    “bunch of savages in this town”

    “who’s your favorite new kid? call me donnie!”

    “How did you get here?”
    “Well, basically, there was this little dot, right? And the dot went bang and the bang expanded. Energy formed into matter, matter cooled, matter lived, the amoeba to fish, to fish to fowl, to fowl to frog, to frog to mammal, the mammal to monkey, to monkey to man, amo amas amat, quid pro quo, memento mori, ad infinitum, sprinkle on a little bit of grated cheese and leave under the grill till Doomsday.”

    “What are you doing here?”
    “Well, I was standing over there, but that didn’t seem to be working out for me, so I moved over here, but this one isn’t much better.”

    “Would sir care for a starter of some garlic bread perhaps?”
    “No, thank you. I will proceed directly to the IV of hard drugs, please.”


  18. 1. You know, there’s nothing wrong with that name.

    There was nothing wrong with it. Until I was about 12 years old, and that no-talent-ass-clown because famous and started winning Grammys.

    2. This is what happens when you FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS!

    3. The secret, I don’t know… I guess you’ve just gotta find something you love to do and then… do it for the rest of your life.


  19. That’s what I love about those high-school girls… I get older, they stay the saaaame age. Yes they do.

    Is there a limit to how many times I can throw these in? I watch a lot of movies…


  20. “I could peel you like a pear and God himself would call it justice!”


  21. Or maybe I won’t try and guess. I’m basically fucked now. DAMN YOU PEOPLE!


  22. “A knife! He’s got a knife!”
    “Of course he has a knife, he always has a knife, we all have knives! It’s 1183 and we’re all barbarians!”


  23. “Are you telling me you can speak six languages and fly a jetliner but you don’t know how to file a tax return? …It’s never come up? …Does this have to happen right now? …No, that’s a “W-2.” “WW2” was the Second World War.”


  24. “You like that word, ‘bullshit’?”
    “It’s a good word.”


  25. “You know, at one time, I used to break into pet shops to liberate the canaries. But I decided that was an idea way before its time.”


  26. “you eat shit for breakfast???”


  27. “This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fucking customers.”

    “I hope it feels so good to be right. There’s nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?”

    ah, randal graves…..


  28. “Somebody blows their nose and you want to keep it?”


  29. I think I just swallowed my tongue.


  30. “The weirdest thing just happened to me.”
    “Was it a dream where you were where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid, with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?”
    “Why, am I the only one who has that dream?”


  31. “Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, when he said, ‘I drank what?’”


  32. “Excuse me, will you blow me where the pampers is?”


  33. here are my answers thus far. I have to paste them all in yet…

    This is embarrassing.


  34. ‘chele,

    the quote I put up “Who are those guys” is repeated several times through the movie.

    Here’s a hint:

    “OOOOHHHHHHHH SSSSHHHHiiiiiittt!!!!!”

    Dad would know this movie in a heartbeat.


  35. Michele:

    By the way, Melissa and I keep hearing about the trend called a starter marriage. Many people our age are getting married but divorced after a few years and then start over with someone new.

    So, we figure we’ll put in about two years and then call it a day. Now, I already have my second marriage lined up with a friend of ours (Melissa approves), but if there are any you want to suggest, maybe we can have a foxy boxing contest to see who gets the honor of becoming your sister-in-law.

    And here’s one more quote:

    “Looks like Rhapsody-in-White has two mommies.”


  36. “Behind the rabbit?”


  37. “That rabbit is dynamite!”


  38. You tit. I soiled my armour I was so scared!


  39. “Life is short. Life is shit. And soon it will be over.” “Its made of monkey come. The drug. its made from monkey come. They keep these monkeys locked up in a room all day, you know, and then they make them jack off and then they boil ir ot something and that’s what the drug is made of.

    Oh yeah. They show them this animal pornography. Kinky stuff like two dogs making love to a cat or a bat and a pig. you know.” “These pipes are clean!” “You will drink the black sperm of my vengence.” “Orange is the new pink!”


  40. “orange is the new pink.”

    jon, you rule.


  41. “No, Walter, you’re not wrong…you’re just an ASSHOLE…”

    “I’m sittin’ here driving, the whole fuckin’ way, ….driving….just trying to… chat..”

    “you’re sitting here’ at you’re little fuckin’ gate here trying to make MY life miserable/ here, here’s you four dollars you’re pathetic piece of shit!”

    “let’s do like we always do, hold the world for ransom with a giant “laser” (dr evil > austin powers”

    “car !
    game on !
    car !
    game on !
    car !
    game on !
    car !
    game on !”


  42. i fucked up above here with austin powers. so heres some to make it right. i hope you get them: i think im also at my limit now. cheers.


    -“Unlimited technology from the whole universe, and we’re cruisin’ around in a Ford P.O.S”

    -“I’m gonna tellem you’re a friend o mine, that means you’re a connected guy”


  43. god, I love movie quotes. so here’s an easy one to keep moral up. i could quote this whole movie i think.

    ” ”…that rug really tied the room together..did it not?…”
    ”…Fuckin’ A….” “


  44. WOOP!

    I love that movie. :)


  45. i’m evil….

    I got the right man. The wrong one was delivered to me as the right man, I accepted him on good faith as the right man. Was I wrong?

    See this system here? This is Hi-Fi… high fidelity. What that means is that it’s the highest quality fidelity.

    If it looks like shit, and it sounds like shit, than it must be shit.

    I, I think she did too much coke.
    Oh you think so doctor?

    Susan, this is Nancy. Nancy, this is Susan.

    Last night, Darth Vader came down from planet Vulcan and told me that if I didn’t take Lorraine out that he’d melt my brain

    If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour … you’re gonna see some serious shit


    He keeps putting his testicles all over me.

    This is pure snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?

    Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.

    Hail Satan! Hail Satan!

    Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.

    Surely you can’t be serious.
    I am serious, and don’t call me Shirley.

    You may find this hard to believe, but I find your fake ass kind of silly

    It’s always the same. I never know what to wear.
    It must be so hard for you, Victoria. I mean, having to decide whether to wear the little Gucci dress, the little Gucci dress, or… the little Gucci dress!
    I know, why don’t you wear the little Gucci dress?
    Good idea. Thanks, Em.

    Kick him in the nards!

    We accept the reality of the world with which we are presented.


  46. I just rememberd one of the best.



  47. i know, i need a little bit of a life, but here we go:


  48. “Danny…a donut with no hole…is a pastry”

    “Somebody’s gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes.”

    “Good… Bad… I’m the guy with the gun.”

    “She is not perfect. You are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other.”

    “All I need is this chair. That’s all I need. And the remote control. And that’s all I need. The chair and the remote control. And the lamp. So it’s the chair, the remote control, and this lamp. And that’s all I need.”

    “Puff, Puff, Give…quit fucking with the rotation”


  49. Y’all are killing independent mihow!!


Leave a ReplyCancel reply