I Believe I’ve Got a Problem. GOD DAMMIT!

About two months ago, Tobyjoe and I were at Enid’s with some friends. While there, a song came on. I couldn’t help but sing along. I made a note to myself: Remember this song. Download it later. It’s from your youth.

Of course, the next day I forgot how it went.

A few weeks after that, I finally broke down and asked Tobyjoe about it.

Honey, do you remember when we were at Enid’s and that song came on? I sang it. It was something about love and forever… You remember how it goes?

No clue.


Well, last night, we watched High Fidelity. And wouldn’t you know, but the song is featured during the credits at the very end. That song is by Stevie Wonder. It’s called I Believe. I ran to the computer and downloaded it immediately.

I believe… GOD DAMNIT!

I sang along and danced around Tobyjoe. He laughed at me and then locked himself in the bathroom. It was frightening, I won’t deny.

I believe when I fall in love with you… GOD DAMNIT!

The biggest problem, however, is I am unable to stop singing it now. I sang it last night, in my sleep, I woke up singing it and today, I keep singing and singing and

I believe when you fall in love with me…. GOD DAMNIT!

singing and singing (you get the point.) It’s making me feel crazy. Suddenly, I want to actually kick the song. Yes, I love it. But give me some peace, Stevie. Please, I beg you, show a lady some mercy.

I believe when I fall in love with you it’ll be forever. GOD DAMNIT!

Someone help me?


  1. Elvira by the Oak Ridge Boys is the only sure fire antidote. Be careful, sometimes the medicine is worse than the disease.


  2. Ooombaba Ooombaba Ooombaba Mow Mow.


  3. Rufus Wainwright has brainwashed me “Cigarettes and Chocolate milk”.


  4. 2.5 hours later and My heart’s still on fire for elvira [Ooombaba Ooombaba Ooombaba Mow Mow]

    h e l p m e


  5. Still on Stevie. Nothing is helping.

    I think I need a doctor.


  6. Try Tom’s Mutherfucking Diner. ;)


  7. I am sitting
    In the Motherfucking morning
    At the Motherfucking diner
    On the Motherfucking corner

    I am Motherfucking waiting
    At the Motherfucking counter
    For the Motherfucking man
    To pour the Motherfucking coffee

    And the Motherfucker Motherfucking fills it
    Only Motherfucking halfway
    And before
    I even Motherfucking argue

    He is Motherfucking looking
    Out the Motherfucking window
    At some Motherfucker
    Coming in

    “It is always Motherfucking
    Nice to see you”
    Says the Motherfucking man
    Behind the Motherfucking counter

    To the Motherfucking woman
    Who has Motherfucking come in
    She is Motherfucking shaking
    Her Motherfucking umbrella

    And I Motherfucking look
    The other Motherfucking way
    As they are Motherfucking kissing
    Their Motherfuckinghellos

    I’m Motherfucking pretending
    Not to Motherfucking see them
    I pour the Motherfucking milk

    I open
    Up the Motherfucking paper
    There’s a Motherfucking story
    Of a Motherfucking actor

    Who had Motherfucking died
    While he was Motherfucking drinking
    It was no one
    I had Motherfucking heard of

    And I’m Motherfucking turning
    To the Motherfucking horoscope
    And Motherfucking looking
    For the Motherfucking funnies

    When I’m Motherfucking feeling
    Some Motherfucker Motherfucking watching me
    And so
    I raise my Motherfucking head

    There’s a Motherfucking woman
    On the Motherfucking outside
    Looking Motherfucking inside
    Does she Motherfucking see me?

    No she does not
    Really Motherfucking see me
    Cause she sees
    Her own Motherfucking reflection

    And I’m Motherfucking trying
    Not to Motherfucking notice
    That she’s Motherfucking hitching
    Up her Motherfucking skirt

    And while she’s Motherfucking
    Straightening her Motherfucking stockings
    Her Motherfucking hair
    Is getting Motherfucking wet

    Oh, this Motherfucking rain
    It will Motherfucking continue
    Through the Motherfucking morning
    As I’m Motherfucking listening

    To the Motherfucking bells
    Of the Motherfucking cathedral
    I am Motherfucking thinking
    Of your Motherfucking voice…

    And of the Motherfucking midnight picnic
    Once upon a Motherfucking time
    Before the Motherfucking rain began…

    I finish up my Motherfucking coffee
    It’s Motherfucking time to catch the Motherfucking train


  8. The good news about the whole Stevie Wonder thing, was yesterday in a desperate attempt to clean my head of such a ditty, I searched the iTunes music store for another version of it. While searching I discovered a NEW (to me) band! Woo! They are called I Am Kloot. And they do a song called “I Believe.” But that song is nothing like Wonder’s. They’re good, though! And they’re from Manchester, England. (I lived there for a short while back in the day.)

    that is all.


  9. one of my absolute favourites.
    get ‘natural history.’
    lovely lovely stuff.


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