In late July, we’re going on a field trip to New Jersey. It’s an all day event. They are taking all of us on a bus. There will be ice cream, burgers, and I think soda pop. We’re also going to play games. I hear we’re able to sign up for softball, horseshoes, and volleyball. I will opt for softball.
I remember field trips were like the greatest thing ever when I was a kid. I remember being mostly excited by two things: 1). What I would have in my brown bag of yumminess and 2). Who I might get to sit next to on the bus. I liked boys back then. I still like boys. But back then when some girls were screaming COOTIES! I was like, “Hello boy, let’s trade heart shaped valentine’s day cards oh, and you should buy me necklaces and Michael Jackson paraphernalia.” Boys were fun. Boys on busses during field trips were ever more fun. Boys on busses during field trips sporting brown bags of yumminess were the greatest of fun.
I remember this one time when the boy I sat next to on the bus threw up. The spontaneous vomiting had nothing to do with me or my brown bagged lunch, but he threw up nonetheless. And instead of stopping and unloading 25+ school children onto the side of the road, we had to drive with the vomit all the way to our destination. I remember watching it move with every ebb and trough and turn hoping it wouldn’t eventually come near me. I remember being really mad at the teacher, who was far from the moving vomit. She should have moved me to a new seat. I mean, really.
The funny part is now that I’m writing this, I can’t seem to remember WHERE we went most of the time. Instead, I remember things like vomiting, boys, and these:

and these:

I also remember bologna handmade and packed by a man named Oscar Meyer.
I think maybe they took us to a farm or two. I mean, we were in Pennsyltuckey after all, so a farm would make sense. I have no idea. I wonder what kids from California do on field trips. I bet they go look for sea critters. And Idaho? Where do Idahinian children go on yellow buses? What makes up a brown bagged lunch in Idaho? I know they had parachute day in Idaho, Doug Martsch told me. In Pennsyltuckey, I think we saw a lot of grass and cows and Amish people. And my brown bag held food products made by people with silly names.


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