Waby Bave.

I can already tell by my intentions going into this post that I’m going to receive some phone calls. I also have the feeling that my ears will ring or my nose will itch, or whatever weird body thing happens when people talk about you while you’re not around.

Lately something has come over me. It came over me much like one of these west coast waves you always hear about. You know, the ones that you hear about washing up and then sucking you back down with its wicked undertow. It seems I was hit by one of these waves. And when I finally stood up again, I was totally upside down.

I have become babified. Every baby I see, I start to imagine how it will look once my and Toby’s genes are both present. Is it wrong that I’ve become excited about this? It’s not a dinner we’d be making, it’s not a mixture of paint. It’s a god damn baby. But still, I’m all putting together this imaginary baby in my head using parts of Toby and parts of myself as if it were a sculpture. It’s like I’m picking out a new car or something. Which, incidentally, we have begun to discuss as well. I am only now realizing how maybe this is yet another baby diversion. And since we can’t get a dog (another Noe Valley, pre-baby staple) because we are overrun by fat cats, I think maybe we’re thinking about cars. Can’t have a baby or a dog? Buy a new car!

I know we live in Noe Valley which is also known as Baby Valley, but it’s not just that. I have no aspirations in becoming a raging, post dot-com, capri-pant wearing, black (or green) SUV driving yuppie like many ornaments dotting our valley. I have no pressure coming in from anywhere. My biological clock was only just recently pulled out of the box.

I know that it won’t come as a surprise to anyone when I say that I truly adore my husband. I’m sure that for those who know the both of us, you are all very well aware of this fact, probably pretty sick of hearing it too. And for anyone else who reads this site (which by the way, thank you for giving me the time of day, I’m not sure how you do) you may also realize as much. But it doesn’t hurt to say it again especially because I still find it so amazing. I love him. I really do. I love that he’s smart and unbelievably witty. I love his big head and his crazy hair (when he lets it get that way). I love that he’s wearing the shoes that I bought him. I love his freckles, and the way he speaks and that people still think he’s a girl over the phone. Most of all, I love that he’s nice. Oh my goodness, is he nice! And he’s kind. He’s one of the kindest people I have ever met. I’m lucky. There isn’t a day that goes by I don’t know this.

Lately, we’ve been kicking around with Cathy and Mike. And they have a little girl. She’s amazing. I’ll leave it at that. And if the internet didn’t scare the hell out of me sometimes with its search strings, I’d post a picture of her and talk about her endlessly. But I won’t. I could easily blame this all on them. I should. I should just blame Cathy and Mike and their unbelievably smart little girl. That’d be easy. But there’s more to it than that. Truth is this: I know that the nose should live on. I really just want a TobyJoe nose of my own. And I want it to be placed on something I made. It’s all about that damn nose. I blame it on his nose. (And those little baby socks, but those are a given).

Is it a wrong reason to want a baby through the dismemberment of the person you love?

20 Comments

  1. mpap got a silhouette of jane’s face before she took off out west so that he could make a pot from that shape. maybe you should do the same with toby…then you could have his nose on something you made, without having to deal with any diaper-changing.

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  2. That’s a wonderful idea! I can clay me a baby! So much cheaper. Side note: Coolest idea ever! That mpap, he amazes me with his voodoo magic.

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  3. Clay you a baby…that’s great! It sounds almost as funny as when you wrote “But Dungeons and Dragons started cutting into our break-dancing time” the other day. Ha!

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  4. I’ve got No Doubt in my head, now, singing just for you…

    ClayBaby ClayBaby Clay!

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  5. What if I drop my clay baby? Plus all of my tools are still at Hinckely pottery because I’m too much of a PUSSY to say goodbye to people. Oh dear me.

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  6. Answer: it is NEVER wrong to want a baby especially when you and the nose-man are gonna be such amazing parents. If the biological clock is a’knocking, I say answer the door! :)

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  7. oh, girl27…you didn’t!
    mihow: your tools are at hinckley for when you return. maybe I’ll keep ‘em warm for you while you’re away…which is your shelf again? :)

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  8. Are your tools sequestered somewhere in the studio? Give me a treasure map and I’ll find ‘em and ship ‘em! (I love babies!)

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  9. or that, too, calvo!

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  10. It’s ALL the fault of Belly. She should start acting up more when we hang out so you don’t think all kids are so awesome. Most of them puke on your face all day and wash it off with their pee while you step in their diapers and catch strep throat from them.

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  11. Now that’s livin!

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  12. You act all tuff and shit, TobyJoe, but you melt around kids and you know it. Last night even, he’s staring at this little baby, making conversations with his eyes. Very cute.

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  13. …or maybe he was trying to make the kid’s head explode using psychokinesis.

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  14. practice for a while before you decide to go pro. actually, i think “kids” almost every day and how fun they’d be…..then i realise “i ain’t got game.” oh well

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  15. Yeah, Belly is a rare breed….But as I am sure you know, not all babies are alike. However that is not to say that yours won’t be perfect in his/her own way. I say go for it!!!!! On a side note though, Belly started her first day of preschool today! (She is growing up! sniff-sniff…)

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  16. I have to say that Simone is the best (and most exhausting) thing we ever did. It is so much fun to see which features, personality traits, etc. she is getting from each of us. Incidentally, Rob and I are not trying to influence your decision by inundating you with baby pics! In fact, I sent the photo album link before I read your post today:)

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  17. Oh dear god. What are you people doing to me? or Toby rather. ;]

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  18. It is all part of our plan to drag you into the Mommy cult!!!! (insert evil mommy laugh here!!)

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