Clown = Evil

I have always thought there might be a genetic predisposition behind the fear some of my family members have of clowns. Both my older brother and I fear them as if they were spawn of satan. I once locked myself in a closet after one entered the video store I worked at in college. Damn clowns. No business they have lurking around like that with fake smiles, fat ugly noses and huge feet.

But when clowns with names such as Spanky are arrested for things like child pornography, I start to think my brother and I stand a chance at starting an anti-clown organization and bringing the conspiracy to the ground. Didn’t this fella learn anything from Gacy? You’re supposed to kill them as well.

Thanks, Nifkin for the linkage. and a new set of nightmares.

9 Comments

  1. As your older brother I’m glad that I have pressed upon you the evilness of clowns. As I have now made your life safer, I hope to pass the knowledge onto my daughter.

    There are only two clowns in history who aren’t evil: Krusty and Red Skelton.

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  2. you people need to get the pop-up book of phobias. it has a spread devoted entirely to fear of clowns. they blame it on “uneven parenting” in many cases. based on how parents tell kids not to talk to strangers then hire teh strangest people possible to be “entertainment” at their birthday parties and parades and such and tell them to go play with them. shrug

    the pop-up book of phobias (amazon.com)

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  3. That’s actually kind of interesting, though I’m not totally buying it. I might actually buy this book, however. Thanks, nif. Clowns are just creepy. If you were to send a giant pink rabbit to my party, I’d be just fine with it. I got no beef with Micky or those freaky dwarves. Clowns reserved a special space in creepy long before humans began wearing stuffed animal outfits. Has anyone seen the move Shakes the Clown? They’re all drunks too. I say we outlaw them.

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  4. GAH! I didn’t need that picture to follow me around today. I can’t stand clowns, but by far the scariest are the hobo clowns. And those people with the clown figurines, they should go to hell right along with the clowns.

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  5. umm, my grandma used to collect those hobo clown figurine things. no offense but i’d like to keep her out of hell if possible, thanks.

    :)

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  6. and at least clowns are more useful than mimes…

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  7. Your grandma is spared. But her figurines will be shattered. When a mime makes the news for burying children in the back yard, we can compare the two.

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  8. Yeah—I saw that about the clown pornographer—but I’m in your camp—clowns are not funny never were. (And Mihow I HAVE to tell you since you read my post yeserday the guy on speaker phone (the BIG bombastic idiot) went to clown school!!!! I kid you not—his name was DOOBIE. Mwahhhhhh.

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  9. holy crap! He must not be reckoned with. He must be destroyed.

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