The contents of my bag.

Last night Toby noticed I had my bag with me. We went to see a show at the Black Cat and we didn’t leave the house until 9:00 and there was no real reason why I needed my bag, I told him it was to hold my camera. But I could have put my camera in my pocket. So there it was, my bag, drooped over my shoulder, a totally extraneous character in the movie of my life. But it got me thinking about my bag. My bag is sort of heavy. It is sort of noticeable. What is in my bag? Have I actually moved anything lately? Have I been somewhere and said,

Thank goodness I have my bag with me!

or

I have that thing you need… I have it in my bag!

No. I haven’t. I’m not sure why I take it everywhere. I just know that one day I’ll be somewhere and NEED something in the damn thing. What? Well, it might help to know what I actually have in it.

THE CONTENTS OF THE BAG.

One United States Passport.

(Not sure why).

My checkbook from my canceled account in Brooklyn

One zip disc, sans a case.

One Motorola phone.

A wallet

(which has other stuff in it, but that’s way too much).

A bottle of Yes! Natural Mood Support.

(I obviously never take).

One packet of Emer’gen-C.

A notepad

One Pink Hi-liter.

Keys to my brother’s apartment in NYC. (My old one).

A small, round piece of wood.

All of my bills and pay-stubs since the day I moved here in a folder.

Two natural, cotton feminine products.

One mystery CDR

A train ticket from NYC to Washington DC

A calendar. Blue

One Elph camera.

Two rings and one 8 Mile movie stub.

Some eye cleaning stuff. (It’s in a plastic tube thingy. Free sample).

Tube of some sort of Herbal Zit-away.

4 Barrettes and a tube of lip balm.

One banana. One, fairly old clementine.

A candle and a small plate to put it on.

(Yes).
And I ask you, what is wrong with me? No one needs this crap. Does it make me feel better knowing I have “stuff” on my person? I think I need to do something about “the bag”. What do other people always have on them? Am I missing something?

19 Comments

  1. I love your bag and its contents.

    My friend always has her passport on hand, ‘cause “you just never know.” (plus, we live close to the Canadian border, so it makes more sense).

    The candle and a small plate to put it on is what cracks me up the most. You just never know when you might want to give someone a small present. Perhaps for a party, you’ll always have a little housewarming gift.

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  2. Well, you see, the candle was given to me as a present. So that’d be regifting, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

    (There, two Seinfeld references in one sentence).

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  3. I’ll take the clementine!

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  4. Oh believe me, you don’t want this one. I have been carrying two around with me for nearly a week and a half now. I pulled one out the other night while sitting around with Toby and said,

    “Hey, you want this?”

    It was about half its size and totally rock hard. I wonder what it looked like inside…

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  5. Why the small piece of wood? Is it a “found object”??

    Not that anyone asked, but
    the contents of my not nearly so mysterious bag are:
    One present for Mihow & Tobyjoe!
    A houndstooth umbrella
    A wallet filled with a ton of crap
    A tiny paper address book
    An empty green file folder
    A handy nylon totebag from a Japanese dollar (100 yen)store that says “Do You Like Asian Goods?”
    stamps
    a makeup case with various girly requirements
    Sharpie
    Work ID

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  6. Actually, I DO want to know. Keep em coming. :]

    A handy nylon totebag from a Japanese dollar (100 yen)store that says “Do You Like Asian Goods?”

    That’s some good stuff right there. :] Excellent.

    PRESENTS!!! YAYA!

    Damn, why must I be so lazy? Yours will come to you very soon. I promise. I do.

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  7. your bags are much more exciting than mine. i go insane if i don’t organize mine every couple of days.

    here’s what i have:
    an orange notepad
    a christmas card inside another christmas card
    ball of green tissue paper
    village voice
    brown hat
    wallet

    i usually accumulate about a thousand receipts at the bottom of my bag each day. they are my nemesis.

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  8. You are not lazy – you are normal. I have no gift expectations. I just turn into a crazed christmas-crafter-over-spender. I need a life, really.

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  9. ok, mine seems a bit boring by comparision.

    tape measure
    loose credit cards (since I’m too lazy to put them back in my wallet)
    wallet
    cell phone
    waranty card
    postcard from my mechanic
    cosmetic bag (with 7 tubes of almost the same shade of lipstick)
    receipts
    deposit slips
    keys
    passport (I’m not sure why either)
    journal

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  10. Here we go:

    -cable & credit card bills
    – Northwest Airlines Miles update
    – coupon for a free rental at Blockbuster
    – coin purse
    – cigarettes
    – phone
    – walet/palm pilot
    – brush
    – checkbook
    – lighter
    – chapstick
    – lip gloss
    – matches
    – 2 pens
    – 34 cent stamps (which do me no good)
    – one earring

    Hey, you asked. My life is pretty boring, upon looking at the contents of my purse.

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  11. Mine’s pretty basic:

    wallet
    cell phone
    chapstick
    keys
    small umbrella
    pen
    1 tampon
    2 condoms

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  12. Tape Measure? Hmmmmmm, wonder if I measure up?

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  13. Missy, and if I do measure up, can we talk?

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  14. Missy is my hero. Sweet about the 2 condoms.
    1’s not enough. You know?

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  15. MY EYES! MY EYES! Dad, you’re so fired.

    “postcard from my mechanic” ooo la la. ;]

    1 tampon, two condoms. he he. Not sure why that’s funny.

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  16. A christmas post card. and he’s not my mechanic in a wink, wink kind of way either. Pervs.;}

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  17. I have four different tubes of hand cream…

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  18. I like making lists. Perhaps this will force me to clean out my bag:

    hello kitty wallet
    checkbook
    nail file
    2 pens
    1 tampon holder
    chapstick
    dental floss
    nicorette (leftover from quit attempt last year)
    eyeglass repair kit
    tissues
    hello kitty pillbox
    gum
    stamps
    assorted movie stubs
    2 lipsticks
    receipt for dinner w/beth
    picture of Marcia, Jan & Cindy Brady
    small mirror
    cold medicine

    jeebus.

    Reply

  19. i don’t carry a bag. i used to carry a big
    key ring with all sorts of keys (not like a janitor, but a buch) including my car key with its remote keylock clicker-thingy on it. That bunch of keys was so damn bulky and ugly. And really, I NEVER used any of them except the car key, so when I quit my last job and started freelancing again I just took the car key off and that’s all I use (since I have an electric garage door opener in the car). It’s really nice to have this one key and its clicker thingy.

    but sometimes, I kinda wish I could carry a big bag of useful stuff around. my rugby kit bag is JAMMED full of all sorts of crap useful on the rugby field and off. But i generally leave that in the trunk of my car.

    Reply

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