Plan B, The Cocktail.
posted by mihow on March 15th, 2007
People tell me that breastfeeding is really important. It’s nutritional for the baby. It helps build mommy-baby bonds. Plus, it’s cheaper. All of those reasons sound good and awesome but the main reason I want to do it is because it’s apparently a surefire way to lose weight. The thing is, I also heard that a lot of new moms have trouble getting the baby to nurse. So, if the baby won’t take my nipple, I have come up with another plan.
“I’d do it myself but my boobs don’t reach that far.”
“Yes, they do.”
“Well, that would hurt. So you’re going to have to do it.”
“Yeah, like I’m going to drink milk from you.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t drink while you’re breastfeeding.”
“We should get lactating women really tanked and then serve their milk in bars mixed in a cocktail. Everyone’s happy.”
“What will we call it?”
15 Responses to “Plan B, The Cocktail.”
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March 15th, 2007 at 08:25 AM
Hooters.
March 15th, 2007 at 08:26 AM
Woo!! Hooters!
March 15th, 2007 at 08:33 AM
Charlie, that’s funny. I was trying to put something into “White Russian” but I’m coming up blank. There is a milk drink (I’ve never heard of) called a Syllabub. I know what to do with that one but it’s not well known enough.
March 15th, 2007 at 12:09 PM
Lactini. Shaken, not stirred. :)
March 15th, 2007 at 01:36 PM
I like it, DigiGirl!
March 15th, 2007 at 02:17 PM
The chest
March 15th, 2007 at 02:19 PM
oh wait…”The Momma’s Boy” ...oh wait…
March 15th, 2007 at 02:23 PM
Hmmm…....for some reason I feel compelled to go have a beer….On Tap….
OK stopping now…apologies….
March 15th, 2007 at 02:34 PM
There’s a drink called the Angel’s Tit already. Keep the name, and throw some in there instead of half and half.
March 15th, 2007 at 03:41 PM
Drinking expired milk is totally gross! you shouldn’t do that!
March 15th, 2007 at 04:15 PM
How about Mamosa?
March 15th, 2007 at 05:58 PM
ha! Meghan.
March 16th, 2007 at 11:37 AM
Milk with knives.
March 17th, 2007 at 04:27 PM
Niptini? Sunny DD?
March 26th, 2007 at 11:26 AM
I co-wrote a screenplay revolving around the (invented) trendiness of breast milk for adults, and the issues of supply / demand / fad longetivity.
We just called it a milktini in the script. However, towards the end the breast milk brand becomes known as Bilk , and the drink is rechristend a Bilktini.