Downtime

July 19th, 2006

Hey there, people of the fine Internet, Tobyjoe and I had a discussion. We’re going away for a while. Soon, we’ll be in a not so secret, remote location without the Internet and we’ve decided to take this site down while we’re away and give it a proper rest. (Goodness knows, I could use it and I’m certain you could, too.) I’m writing this to warn folks before it self-destructs.

Let’s share secrets.

My secret? I don’t always wash my hands after I pee. Now, shake my hand.

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Heat Wave

July 18th, 2006

It’s a hundred degrees in New York City and people are grumpy. Sweat dotted the shirts of most commuters. New York City’s bowels are rearing their heads. A filmy, visible stench wafted up Broadway on squiggly cartoon lines. Only this smell isn’t meant to be funny.

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Julianne Puts the Moore in Crazy.

July 17th, 2006

We watched Freedomland last night. It’s another movie where Julianne Moore loses her mind and acts like a hysterical female. As I watched this last night, it occurred to me, yet again, that no other actress pulls off the crazy quite as well as Julianne Moore. Her plethora of crazy scenes immediately came flooding back to me. In Short Cuts, she stands in the middle of the room pant-less and panty-les and argues with her husband (Matthew Modine). She played a sexy, single mother cokehead. The scene on the bed with Heather Graham still makes me cringe. (Seriously, I’ve seen crazier people NOT laugh that well.) There’s the cake-baking scene between her and her son in The Hours where the viewer can just tell that she’s about to lose it. You’re just not sure when. After realizing her cake is less than perfect she checks into a hotel room and suddenly Jimmy Webb’s lyrics begin to make sense. Then, there’s Safe. I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t still haunted by Safe. I think I will always be haunted by Safe. What a horribly UNHAPPY film. (Seriously, if you’re looking for that extra push toward that anti-depressant prescription start by watching Safe.) Safe made me feel entirely too uncomfortable. I watched the entire film with the same look on my face. (What the f uh?) Her inability with breathing the air around her is my inability to trust food. I have a huge weak spot in my mental foundation. Then, there’s that really uncomfortable scene in Magnolia, which takes place in a pharmacy.

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Yesterday

July 11th, 2006

Usually when I sense something bad is about to happen it doesn’t. Yesterday, I left the house and immediately sensed that the things taking place around me were off (or on, depending on how you look at it). There had been a car wreck. It took place not minutes before I left the apartment. I saw it from the corner. A car had been nearly cut in half from its grill to the middle of the car. It’s almost as if driver had literally tried to separate themselves from their passenger.

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Bye Bye World Cup.

July 10th, 2006

Well, the World Cup has come to an end. I actually started crying into my New York Times Sports Section this morning. As many already know, I have grown absolutely obsessed with football over the past month. I can’t even put words behind how fantastic it’s been. I take a great long sigh seeing this World Cup come to an end.

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My Luck With Cell Phones Might Not Be As Bad As I Thought.

July 10th, 2006

For kicks, I plugged in my black Razr this morning. You know, the one I washed not three months ago. It’s without a SIM card because the one I do have is currently sitting in the pink Razr I lost on Friday. But wouldn’t you know, the phone is working. I’m not sure what to do at this point. Do I go into TMobile and ask for a new SIM card? Do they replace SIMs? Can I keep the same number? Hopefully, I won’t need to buy a new phone.

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Today’s News: The Good. The Bad.

July 8th, 2006

I have good news and bad news. I’ll start with the positive. The woman from the New York Athletic Club wrote me back about the soccer league. She was super kind and reassuring. I’m going to actually play on Wednesday and am giddy with excitment but I do need to buy a pair of shoes and some shinguards and we’re hurting a little financially at the moment.

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Someone Explain This To Me.

July 7th, 2006

When I first saw this article over on Gothamist, I started to believe in God. And then I read it.

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Michele and Tobyjoe Bake Scones.

July 6th, 2006

It has begun. I’m going to figure out - once and for all - if I like scones. Tonight we’re making cranberry oat scones. Wish the scones luck.

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Tobyjoe’s New Uniform.

July 6th, 2006

Ladies, if you see this t-shirt, run like hell. Run like the wind but make sure that if you’re running you’re wearing panties.

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