Reader Poll:

posted by mihow on June 3rd, 2005

Today, at the gym I was changing after a shower. I had a top locker. A woman came in and needed to get to the locker right below mine. I moved my stuff and my body over and let her in. She was bending down and when she was getting back up, her head hit my locker. Hard. I felt REALLY bad. She was visibly annoyed. I imagine it really hurt.

Here’s my question:

  • A). Was it my fault. Should I have thought to shut the locker? Am I a dildo?
  • B). Was it her fault? Should she have known?
  • C). Was no one at fault? Was it just a horrible mistake?
  • D). Will something later today bite me where my balls would be in a karmatic retribution?

I feel like such a dildo. (It’s O.K. to agree with my being a dildo. I must learn.)

19 Responses to “Reader Poll:”

  1. andrea Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:19 AM

    b) if i had a locker under you, i would wait until you are done before i shove myself in there, so in that way, hers.

    a) but if you knew she was going to be coming up and you wanted to knock her out, then yours.

    c) otherwise, just one of those things that happens. like tripping on a curb.

  2. Jon Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:20 AM

    did you move adjust the open-ness of the locker between her bending down and getting up?

    if she hit a locker that was in the same position as when she bent down, she’s an idiot

  3. mihow Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:29 AM

    I did not move the locker door. that would have been truly dildoish (if there were such an adjective).

  4. tobyjoe Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:43 AM

    she probably litters, anyway

  5. mihow Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:48 AM

    Clif bar wrappers. Bitch.

  6. jon Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:54 AM

    what a fucking dildo

  7. mihow Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 10:57 AM

    The only way one should be.

  8. Jon Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 11:17 AM

    Speaking of ‘dildo’

    I think this movie says it about 1x a minute

    Flesh Gordon ( @ imdb.com )

  9. Amanda B. Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 11:41 AM

    I think your Kharma is safe. It was a fluke, just one of those things that happens. She was probably more annoyed with the shock of banging her head than anything. You are not a dildo.

  10. Charlie Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 01:51 PM

    I say the pushy broad got her just desserts. Makin you move and shit. What’s up with that??? I can’t believe you didn’t bust out laughing at her. That’s what I would have done. I bet she litters, too. I mean, you’re worried about bad karma happening to you, but you should REALLY wonder what terrible thing did SHE do to merit the karmic crack in the head. Something pretty bad, I bet.

  11. BSmith Says:
    June 3rd, 2005 at 02:57 PM

    I agree…she is the dildo

  12. eco2geek Says:
    June 4th, 2005 at 05:56 PM

    It was an accident and you’re being too hard on yourself. (Plus, you’re single-handedly negating all those stereotypes one hears about New Yorkers by feeling guilty about it.)

  13. eco2geek Says:
    June 4th, 2005 at 05:57 PM

    It was an accident and you’re being too hard on yourself. (Plus, you’re single-handedly negating all those stereotypes one hears about New Yorkers by feeling guilty about it.)

  14. eco2geek Says:
    June 4th, 2005 at 05:58 PM

    H’mm, guess it took the first time, even though I got an error message about referrer logging not being turned on.

  15. mihow Says:
    June 5th, 2005 at 12:57 PM

    No worries, eco.

  16. Sherri Says:
    June 5th, 2005 at 06:43 PM

    Freak accident. Nobody’s fault. But she should be more careful.

    There’s a chick at my gym who scatters her stuff ALL OVER and then goes to take a shower. I always kick her stuff out of my way. REALLY HARD. But she deserves it, because she’s a rude and selfish bitch.

  17. Closet Metro Says:
    June 6th, 2005 at 04:20 AM

    Does being a klutz make one a dildo, or does being a klutz and then being visibly angry at others for it make one a dildo. Because if klutz = dildo, I’m Steely Dan.

    You are not a dildo.

  18. mihow Says:
    June 6th, 2005 at 05:08 AM

    Metro, you’re hilarious. The part I left out was when she was closing her locker again, after she hit her head, she said “I’m going to CLOSE MY locker.” just like that. heh

  19. j o h n Says:
    June 6th, 2005 at 10:48 AM

    Just use my rule of thumb -

    Was she hotter than you?

    If so, then “Ha! Sucks to be you, slutt!”

    If not, then “Awww, that’s so sad.”

    May be shallow, but it works quickly. And speed is the essence whenever faced with a moral quandry.

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